Like a baby bird chirping desperately for its mother’s return to the nest to bring the food that will keep it alive, there is a yearning that lives within you, and it calls incessantly. It can be satiated with the smallest of moments, and it has a camel’s resistance to thirst, but if you ignore it too long, it will shrivel and die.

And as it does, color will fade from your world. Meaning will ebb away, enjoyment will wither, and you’ll sit around trying to remember a time in your life when richness existed. You’ll get dry, stiff… and when you hardly recognize the crusty you that you’ve become, you’ll chalk it up to being busy. Or being a parent. Or being a professional. Or getting older.

But it has nothing to do with any of those things.

The Urgent Call is your spirit’s need for connection. Like the migrating herds of the plains of Africa, who travel thousands of miles every year in search of life-giving food and water, your spirit has an essential drive to feel its connection to all around it. It’s the reason we seek community. It’s the reason we search for purpose and meaning in life. It’s the reason we feel better when we’re on a spiritual path, and it’s the reason that it doesn’t really matter what path that ends up being.

What matters is that you connect.
What matters is the Urgent Call gets listened to.
It doesn’t matter how your Urgent Call gets fulfilled, only that it does.

Mind Schmind

Oh, sure, your rational mind wants to be right, it wants everything to make logical sense, and it wants reasoning to explain your beliefs. And those things are fine… for the mind. But the Call doesn’t need those things (which is why it’s doubted and ridiculed so often); the Call just needs connection.

The evidence for this is that this post makes sense to you. Logically? Reasonably? Heck no. Your left brain probably doesn’t have a clue in hell what I’m talking about, and it’s going a little nutso trying to figure out where this is going, matching patterns and looking for a logical conclusion. In fact, it’s probably liking this little explanation, because it can understand it. “Ahh,” it says, “I’m feeling much more comfortable now that you’re speaking my language.”

Left brain loves that this post is probably going to talk about life purpose, or pursuing your passions, or finding what juices you up and going for it. It’s hoping that I’m going to end this post with a three- or five-step process, a witty conclusion, or steps to finding your personal mission statement.

Hey, left brain: F off. This is not for you.

This is for the part of you that cries at sentimental commercials. It’s for the part of you that honors the life and struggle of the smallest spider crawling up your wall. It’s for the part of you that totally gets fed by a moving musical performance, a selfless act of service, or a hug.

If you aren\'t seeing the embedded video, click here to view.

It’s for the part of you that can have all the material things you want in this world, have a great job, eat fabulous food, vacation regularly, drive an expensive car, want for nothing… and still want. Here’s a tip: it’s not the stuff of this world that answers your Urgent Call… it’s the space between the stuff. More accurately, it’s that the space gets seen, felt, and honored.

One moment of touch can do it. One breath of togetherness. One searching call into the great unknown, and the guaranteed answer that returns. Sure, you have to be open to calling, and be open to receive the answer, but it only takes a drop of connection for the momentum of your life to turn around and point you back on the road to fulfillment.

If you’ve been feeling empty lately, as if the world has gone gray-scale, or that you’re just missing something, then now you know what you need to do. Stop looking outside. Stop looking for things to stuff into the hole, because no amount of Dolce & Gabbana, Crate & Barrel, or Ben & Jerry’s is going to do the trick this time. You’re going to have to quiet your mind, stop listening to the fluff, and listen to the essential, the primordial, the ancient.

Make the Call. It’s the only thing that’s going to work.

Image by ~MVI~.

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 5 comments

Mmm... steaming hot ramen.

What I enjoyed most about the movie, without giving away too many details, was the main ingredient that Brittany Murphey’s character, Abby, learned to infuse into her ramen that made it special: spirit. Because in the end, this was not a movie about ramen, or romance. It was about finding one’s place in the world by focusing on the how more than the what.

“How” comes from within

The fact that Abby learned to make a great bowl of ramen is secondary to what it required of her to do it. She got the recipe right long before she was able to make a meal that was worthy of being served to her customers, because she was taught that making soup isn’t just about getting a bunch of ingredients and assembling them. It’s about heart. Unless your soup has spirit, it hasn’t got anything.

It’s a lesson that, I believe, resonates for many of us. We spend a lot of time reading books about parachutes or real-life stories of people searching for their “perfect” jobs. We’re taught to believe that if we just find the right career, we’ll be mystically satiated, and we’ll labor away blissfully for the rest of our lives. The emphasis here is placed on the initial discovery, and the promise is that once that discovery is made, the rest is downhill. (If you think about it, this ideal is promulgated in many arenas, from relationships to parenting to politics.)

The Ramen Girl teaches something else, though. It teaches that “getting the recipe right” is only the first step. In order to truly do something well, to transform it from ordinary to exceptional—and to transform yourself in the process—requires an internal contribution that goes beyond meticulousness and hard work. You have to invest yourself in what you’re doing. You have to be willing to be vulnerable, to give of yourself to your patrons through your work. It makes work personal, intimate, and unique.

The Divine is in the Details

As a webdesigner, I can churn out code until the cows come home. I can tweak settings, configure plugins, and customize design details until my fingers turn blue. And in so doing, I can be a good webdesigner, and serve my clients well. I’ll even feel the satisfaction of a job well done. But, is that all I should hope for?

If you want to feel like you’re doing your best work, the scorecard that matters is not the one that can be judged by what shows up on the screen, or on the paper, or in the product. Satisfaction—the bone-deep, spirit-lifting, existential experience of meaning—is found in the value and the interaction of your work and its target. In other words, it’s what your work creates in the experience of another that comes back to you as satisfaction. If it matters, then it matters, no matter what you’re called, from carpenter to coach to CEO.

It’s in the pursuit of that intangible satisfaction that work finds its meaning, we find our purpose, and the path of mastery is made clear. And, at every step of the way, it’s up to you to choose the giving road, the road of excellence, the road of interaction and connection, with your soul laid bare. It may not be easy, but the best things in life rarely come without incredible effort.

Image by bass_nroll.

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 8 comments

I’ve been meaning to write a post about it, just so you all know I haven’t fallen off the wagon completely… But then Fabeku beat me to it. Brilliantly.

Of course, our histories are different. And each of us has our preferences, and brings to it what we do. But all the reasons Fabeku speaks about as to why he chants… how it rejuvenates him, how it cleans him out and fills him up… he could’ve been channeling me, there.

Why it matters

So I chant. Fabeku chants. Big whoop, right? Well, as I’ve been a fan of saying for some time now, when it comes to spiritual practices,

It doesn’t matter so much what you do… but it matters a ton why you do it.

I stopped working as a healer a over year ago now. I was talking about this with my wife the other night, and I told her that one of the big reasons why was because I felt dry. I didn’t feel I had anything left to give… I just couldn’t be there for my clients the way I could before. And to be honest, I was never completely satisfied with my answer as to why that was.

I chalked it up to the thought that I had been doing it for too long. Or that I was having doubts about my spiritual path, and that was the reason. Or that I had this, or that, or whatever. But now I see pretty clearly that the reason I burned out was because I wasn’t replenishing my reserves. I was running on fumes, and didn’t have anything left in the tank to give, because I had lost my connection to the divine flow that all my juice was coming from.

But, I know my story. What’s yours? And will you know before you burn out?

The point is this: You had better have a way to tap into whatever gives you juice, long before you give it all away. No matter what your line of work is, you expend energy when you do it. When you give to others, it’s gotta be coming from somewhere. I’m not saying that the work itself can’t be partially rejuvenating; it often is (I hope it is, otherwise you probably aren’t having much fun doing it…). And I’m not taking a “scarcity mindset” here, either, and saying that you’re automatically in trouble. There’s more than enough for everyone to drink, all the time.

What I am saying is that everyone who gives is tapped into a source, whether it’s conscious or not.

My advice is to get to know what fills up your tank. Really well. Really consciously. And not just what you do to take a break—taking a break isn’t filling you up, it’s just slowing down the rate at which you’re emptying the tank.

Chant seems to do it for me. What does it for you?

Image by metal-armz

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 8 comments

Why? Because, the logic goes, when you are feeling grateful for something, you’re in a state of appreciation and happiness, which begets a greater state of happiness. The more you get accustomed to feeling good about what you have, the more you get to feel good about, and the more good you feel about what you have, and so on… it’s an ever-growing spiral.

But what if gratitude brings you down?

I have to admit, I used to resist gratitude in a huge way. Not because I have anything against showing appreciation, but because whenever I’d do a practice involving gratitude, I ended up feeling small and unhappy, which is the opposite of what it was supposed to do for me.

Not cool, I thought. Not cool.

But, being the ever-curious guy that I am, I decided to probe a bit deeper into why I was feeling this way, wondering if I could find a way to an effortless, empowering gratitude practice, and away from the depressing version I’d been practicing. So, like I used to do with my healing clients, I watched myself while I expressed my gratitude to see what the problem was.

And right away, I realized that there wasn’t a problem. There were two.

One Problem Was Shame

Sometimes, situations in your life can link negative feelings to something otherwise positive, such as gratitude. When that happens, it can cause feelings of contraction even when, for most people, the same situation would cause feelings of expansion.

My habitual way of cultivating gratitude—and I’m guessing this is pretty common—was to think of something in my life that I was thankful for, and then, just like we’re taught when we’re kids, to thank someone for it.

But remember when you were a kid and you got a gift from someone? There you are, staring down at your brand new Lego castle, or shiny new stuffed animal, and you’re just thrilled. You’re thinking about all the fun you’ll have with your new toy, and your parents, mortified that you might grow up to be socially uncouth someday, jump on your back and say, “What do you say, huh?”

You look at them, steeped in shame, and whimper, “Thank you.”

What a bummer, huh? You’re just jazzed about what life just brought you, and you get shamed into muttering a ‘thanks’ when you aren’t really up for it. Now you feel like a loser for not saying it without being hounded. And so receiving a gift and feeling great about it has now been linked to feelings of shame. How wonderful.

That was my experience to a ‘T’. As soon as I felt gratitude, I felt shame along with it. I felt that I wasn’t good enough for what I’d received. Talk about shutting down the fun factory!

The Other was the Other

I also realized that in addition to the shame piece, my efforts at gratitude were at odds with my spiritual beliefs. Not as if I was saying, “We don’t do gratitude around here,” in the same way some folks don’t believe in vaccinations, reincarnation, or going outside without your head covered.

I’m talking about an incongruity in the sense of not-being-aligned-with-my-experience-of-Oneness. My experience of the Divine has taught me to believe that the Oneness permeates everything in (and out) of creation, and therefore, in the deepest sense of things, there is no “outside”, and no “other”. And, therefore, the idea of thanking something “outside of me” for bringing me something, as if I couldn’t have obtained it otherwise, was really, really stifling.

This ego-centric, disembodied concept of God was really putting a kink in my chances to experience true gratitude, because every time I tried to feel good about something in my life, I reverted to feeling tiny, insignificant, and separate from All That Is. Bummer, huh?

So, in short, the practice of gratitude became a shame-inducing exercise in smallness. Rrrrrrrt! Hit the brakes!

Redefining Gratitude

If you’ve got roadblocks in the way of tapping into feelings of thankfulness and gratitude, it can seriously hamper your efforts to move forward in your life, not to mention put a halt on the growth of your business. I mean, what kind of signal does it send when a taste of success comes your way, and instead of appreciating it, you feel shameful and less than deserving? Geez!

So if you know—or suspect—that this is the case for you, here’s what I recommend:

• Take a moment to quiet your mind, and step into the process of expressing gratitude (if you need a cue for that, try thinking about something in your life you like, and simply say, “thanks.”). Notice what happens inside you, emotionally speaking, and with your thoughts.
• Take whatever bizarre thoughts, painful memories, or incongruous emotions come to the surface and apply your favorite healing technique (mine, EFT, whatever).
• Watch and see what happens to your feelings and thoughts about gratitude.
• And once you feel a good degree of resolution from the past, start visualizing how you’d like gratitude to work for you. You can ask yourself, “If I were to have a practice of gratitude that fit entirely with my beliefs and were to bring me incredible peace, energy, and joy, what would it be?

My new practice allows me to experience a profound state of gratitude and appreciation for everything in my life, and it rekindles the sense of intrinsic connection and flow I share with the Oneness, in a taoist-like sense. It’s empowering and paradigm-changing, and I’m really grateful for it.

And that’s the great thing about this: no matter where you’re coming from, no matter what hand life has dealt you, you can create a new practice, a new relationship, to gratitude that is healthy, positive, and empowering.

And that is something to be grateful for.

Image by >lonushi.

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 18 comments

Why, in seemingly every tradition, are there ritual practices?

Because rituals work, that’s why. They work through repetition; through continual practice, the attentive mind learns the steps until they are memorized. Once the mind’s focus is no longer needed to complete the ritual, it goes on “auto-pilot”, and the adept can repeat the ritual and focus the mind deeper, awakening the heart/soul/whatever (depends on the ritual, of course). This allows for a much deeper level of presence to be had, transforming the result of the ritual, and the mind of the practitioner.

Or, as my martial arts teacher would say, “First, the mind teaches the body what to do. Then, the body refines the movement, teaching the mind how it wants to move. Finally, body and mind are united as one.” He also said that once you performed an action 10,000 times, you had it mastered.

Clearly, rituals rock. In disciplines such as spirituality, or martial arts, that’s a no-duh statement. But what about in your work day? Do you have rituals?

If you answered no, allow me to differ. Uh, email? Twitter? Checking your voice mail?

And those are just the ubiquitous ones… depending on what line of work you’re in, you’ve probably got a bunch more. Here are some of mine:

• Health: CrossFit, 4-5 days a week. And if you think CrossFit doesn’t count as a ritual, you don’t know CrossFitters! We check the Workout of the Day (WOD) religiously, the star-performers of CrossFit are like heroes, and we read the CrossFit Journal like it’s a holy text. Trust me; don’t get in between a CrossFitter and his/her workout.
• Personal Growth: I have a set of practices I do regularly designed to enhance my sense of connection, develop my focus, and keep me moving towards the future I envision. These include gratitude, visualization, self-healing, and more (I’ll be sharing more about this as time goes on, in case anyone’s curious…).
• Business: I write, tweet, and email, like many do. I also regularly search for web design and development knowledge, reading feeds of favorite designers and design compendiums, investigating WordPress plugins and theme developments, etc.

There are more, of course, but you get the idea.

In my mind, these all qualify as rituals, because the more I do them, the more aware I am of the effects of the practice themselves, and the more I transform as a person through doing them (yes, even through Twitter). They make me better at what I do, of course… but it would be easy to do any of these and not get the same benefits.

What makes the difference? Intention. Have the intention to carry your focus and presence deeper as you do your daily rituals, and see what happens. If you’ve never thought of your work as potential for ritual before, take a moment and reflect on your day… where does this idea of ritual make perfect sense?

Some days are just meh.

Of course, some days you’re on, and some days you aren’t. Some days, email is just email. Meditation is just sitting there. Chanting is just mindless blather. After all, I’m no Master Oogway, either.

But that’s not a deficiency in the ritual, it’s a lack of intention and presence. Any regular activity can be transformed into ritual with the proper mindset.

So, if you notice yourself out of the groove one day, you’ve got a choice: Hop back up into the saddle, or let it go, and just be where you’re at (that’s called ‘acceptance’). There’s always another day.

What rituals do you use?

Image by moriza.

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 9 comments

Out with the old, in with the new.

That’s my motto right now. I reserve the right to change it, if/when it suits me, but that seems to be the flavor of my thinking lately.

Ever have the feeling your business could use an emema? I did/do, and I’ve been laying down on that table for quite some time now.

To help steer me away from expanding on that metaphor, and to give you some context, let me give you some background. This will be especially helpful for those of you who haven’t known me all that long, all that well, or just are curious about the path I’ve come to tread and where this blog is going. I’ll try to be succinct…

Tra-la-la-ing down memory lane…

When I was 24, I went to a school for energetic healing, which soon became spiritual/energetic healing, and after graduating, I taught for them. But, since it was part-time, I had a private practice on the side, and started teaching groups, too. One thing morphed into another, and I was a healer/intuitive/teacher/thingy, and needed a platform. That platform became Monk at Work.

When my long-time buddy Dawud Miracle got me into blogging (so now you know who to thank/blame), the only way I thought to write was the same way I’d been doing for my email newsletters and for my classes, which was the Authority model. As in, “I’m the authority, and here’s what you need to know.” Which is great, if that’s what you think you need. But, as you’ll soon see, that set me up for some rough times…

Time passed. I kept writing, learning, and teaching. My subscribers grew, and life was good. Until the bottom fell out.

About two years ago, the school I was teaching with underwent both a metamorphosis and a financial crunch, and I found myself jobless. Not a huge deal, I thought; I saw it coming for a long time. I figured I’d be fine with my own classes, clients, and products, and life would continue on pretty much as it had before.

And it was good. I enjoyed my work, I kept on writing, and, free of the organization that had shaped so much of my development for so many years, and all the expectations that came along with it, I was free to explore my spiritual path without anyone “looking over my shoulder”, so to speak. I was accountable to no one but myself.

But then, doubts that I had long been suppressing arose. Rumors that had been circulating were examined. Curtains were lifted, and I peered behind them. And—long story carefully sidestepped—I didn’t like what I found.

This led to a lot of soul searching. And a lot of research. And a lot of raging. And a few pity parties (I was the only one who attended, though, thank god). And I came to a few inescapable conclusions:

• I didn’t like how exclusionary my beliefs had become.
• I didn’t feel the same kind of joy with my spiritual path as I once did.
• I didn’t like having my spiritual well-being and my financial well-being merged into one vehicle.
• I had lost my spiritual direction, and going back to it was not an option.

Now, if you think this is easy for me to write about, you’re dead wrong. I’m practically crapping in my pants writing this right now, because I’ve never said this publicly before. Imagine: the financial well-being of your wife and kids, who count on you for the roof over their heads and the food on their plates, is on your shoulders. You have clients, students, and people in your community who look to you for direction, and you no longer have answers for them. All of your so-called status is wrapped up in something that just evaporated like a fart in the wind. And now, you’re talking about it with the world.

What do you do?

Well, I have no idea what you’d do, but here’s what I did: I quit teaching. I completed with all my clients and handed them to someone else. I collapsed my website and tried going in a different direction (Viverati, I’m looking at you). I plunged headlong into a long-time hobby of mine—webdesign—and beefed up my skills to the point where I could go professional with it. I learned more about WordPress that I knew there was to know, and I keep learning more all the time. In short, I took a side passion and ran with it, because my old roads had been demolished.

But still, Monk at Work remains.

This blog remains. You remain, reading this. And even though I haven’t felt very Monkish in quite some time, I realize that this is my home, and I want to be here. I want to have you here. But not as your Authority.

When I announced Monk at Work’s Grand Re-Opening, I thought I could just waltz back in and start writing again. But with all that got washed away in my great flood, the Authority model got washed away with it.

Every week I think, “I really need to write a blog post”, but I haven’t been able to. My habits turn to the Authority model, but my heart is somewhere else. I’m not the Authority anymore, if I ever even was. I’m just me, in a monk’s clothing (speaking of, if anyone knows where I can get some saffron monk’s robes, I’d love to know).

It took some time, some conversations with my wife, and a few good examples to see that I have a voice without the Authority, and it’s worth sharing.

Besides, I don’t think being teachy-preachy really helps all that much. What I think helps is having friends to share the journey with, hearing the real story from what people go through, and learning from the experiences of others. The people I like to read the most aren’t proselytizing, they’re just being themselves. The funnier, the crazier, the more unique, the more honest and authentic, the better. I don’t expect them to be “the world’s best”; I expect them to be themselves.

Whether people show up at their finest, or fall flat on their face, makes no difference. I feel closer to them when they’re being honest, and I learn either way. So why, on God’s Green Earth, am I expecting something else from myself, and from you?

So, here’s the wake-up call.

If you’ve been reading me because you want a perfect model of how to be/do/have something, it’s time to unsubscribe, and search for your own personal guru somewhere else. There are plenty of people out there who would love to take your fawning admiration and inflate themselves with it, but I’m no longer one of them. It disgusts me that I used to be in that fraternity, even if it wasn’t a conscious intention of mine to be there. It happened, and I’m putting it behind me.

If you’re wanting to hear the personal journey of a man trying to live consciously, do good things, learn fun stuff, get in damn good shape, and unleash his triple-Virgo self all over what it takes to operate a successful website, then stick around. I’m planning to share my insights on all the stuff I’m interested in, from productivity to WordPress to macs, from CrossFit to personal development to social media, and try to do it all as genuinely and authentically as I can. No promises of brilliance, no claims to perfection, no one-up/one-down teacher/student relationships. Just me. Just you.

Image by pixelfahrenheit20.
Just friends.

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2008. | Permalink | 30 comments

Either way, a new year presents a wonderful opportunity. Sure, you could say it’s just another day, another week, another month. But there’s a shift that happens when a new year dawns; a hope that you can feel—and take advantage of—to make changes in the way you do things. The question then becomes: what to change?

Of course, it all depends on your priorities… and they fall in line behind your goals… which are a product of what’s important to you. To help you get a bit more clear on what’s important to you, and brainstorm a bit about possible changes to make, here are a few ideas to sit with and see what sparks your interest.

1. Redefine your targets.

What’s important to you in your life? Another way of asking that is: What are you working towards? Retirement (years from now)? Location-Independent living? A few extra trinkets for you and yours?

If you aren’t clear on what your targets are, you’ll want to take some time to think long and hard about this one. After all, it’s a big world, and the choices are limitless… you can craft your life however you want. Knowing what targets you’re aiming at influences every action, every decision, every choice that follows.

(If you haven’t yet read The Four-Hour WorkWeek, you owe it to yourself to get a hold of a copy… Tim has an eye-opening philosophy when it comes to life, as well as excellent tools to help you get clear on what you’ll need to achieve your plans.)

2. Planning sessions.

Once you’re clear on your targets, take some time to do some planning. You may want to set aside some alone time to dream, mind-map, and feel into your path. You may also want the support that a mastermind group can offer; if you don’t have a group, think about starting one. Either way, working without a plan is like driving a race car blindfolded; you’ll stand a much better chance of getting where you want to go if you can see where you’re headed.

3. Clean out your office.

Working in a space that’s bogged down with old papers, unused files, and irrelevant project materials is like taking your grandmother with you on a first date; there’s history there that’s just not helpful. Instead, clear out the clutter from your space, organize it in a way that’s productive, and freshen things up; you’ll benefit immensely from the mental space you feel.

4. Clean up your computer.

Does your desktop look like an unfinished jigsaw puzzle? Do you have scores of folders and files piling up on your hard drive, making it hard to find what you need? You can save yourself a lot of time and headaches by devoting some time to clearing out your old computer detritus. Can’t part with it? Put the stuff you aren’t sure if you’ll need or not into storage: burn some DVDs, or stash it online.

5. Paint a room, or a wall.

You’d be amazed what some color can do for you. My office is mostly green, but I’ve got one wall that’s red, and it’s amazing. New color = new life.

6. Show your gratitude and love to someone.

Maybe there’s someone in your life that you haven’t been in touch with in a while, or someone who plays a special role in your life that you haven’t shared your feelings with lately; ringing in the new year is a great reason to reach out. But it doesn’t have to be a person, either: is there an organization you’ve admired, but haven’t made contact with? It could be a humanitarian organization or an environmental group, a software company, or a non-profit that serves your area. Call them, write them, or visit. It’ll do you both a world of good.

7. Commit to your health.

As they say, “Without your health, you haven’t got anything.” So what in your routine could use some tweaking, or a complete overhaul? Your eating habits? Exercise? Sleep patterns? There’s a world of good information out there; grab a recommendation from someone who’s got the area you want to focus on dialed in, and see what you can learn. After all, none of us are getting any younger!

8. Learn something new.

There’s nothing like following a passion to learn something new to breathe new energy into your life. You can focus on anything you want… and, you may want to learn something that plays into your work; it’s up to you. Need ideas? How about a new language to expand your client base? A software program that will allow you to do all kinds of fun things with your work? Or a skill (like typing dvorak to rid yourself of RSI), or a sport (to interact with new people), or a musical instrument?

9. Lighten the weight of debt.

There’s nothing like dropping old baggage to make you feel light again… resolving to clearing up old debt is a great way to head into the new year. It doesn’t just have to be financial debt, either. If you feel an outstanding obligation in a relationship you have, or the feeling that you owe somebody for something they’ve done for you, pay it back it whatever way you can. You’ll feel so much better once you do.

10. Commit to your spiritual well-being.

Your spiritual health is a deciding factor in your enjoyment of life, your ability to be creative and spontaneous, and your sense of purpose and fulfillment. But that doesn’t mean being spiritual can’t also be a blast! Look for ways to let your spiritual connection be a source of fun, as well as an outlet for your devotional tendencies. You can try new spiritual practices, or play with ways to make your tried-and-true acts of devotion more fulfilling, more expanding, or more celebratory.

What are you going to do to get ready for 2008?

Let us know in the comments. Or, if you need some help figuring it out, ask for it in the comments, too.

Image by bingbing.

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2007. | Permalink | 8 comments

And that’s Elena’s problem (or so she’s been told). Her friend told her, “You’re too passionate, E… you jump from one thing to the next more often than anyone else.”

And it’s true — when she finds something that catches her attention, she’s on it like a hungry dog on a fresh bone, and she learns everything she can about her new passion.

So even though she loves learning, that voice often goes off in her head that says, “Maybe they’re right… maybe I should really cool my jets on this. I’m thinking about this way too much.”

But what the heck would she listen to that voice for?

Where some people see restlessness, Elena sees passion. She’s motivated to be her best, and sometimes that means “changing your clothes” more often than most.

When something inflames your curiosity, it’s a sign that you’re on the right track towards self-discovery. While too often a new passion gets brushed off as restlessness, or a lack of commitment to what you were doing before, passion can be a signal that you’re on the road to something deeper.

Passion puts you on the road to wholeness.

When it comes right down to it, you’re seeking wholeness (whether you know it or not). It’s the game of life that we’re all playing. When your passion gets inflamed, it’s a signal to you that you’re coming close to something that you need in order to recognize your innate wholeness. When you’re moving closer to that which makes you whole, your being can smell the potential, and it gets excited.

And that inner geiger counter, that bloodhound-of-your-soul that’s sniffing its way towards wholeness, is what drives passion.

But the naysayers aren’t always wrong; passion can be a diversion, a smokescreen. If you’re needing to stay focused (on a project, on your career, on your spouse….), and something comes along that makes you sit up and take notice, it doesn’t always mean you should chase after it. Sometimes, that radar can lead you astray.

But how can you tell the difference?

The difference is made by the timbre of the passion; the characteristic quality of the passion that’s driving you.

(To understand the differences in timbre, I’m going to have to describe this as best I can… and since my background is in the energetics of systems that exist a bit off the beaten path from the typical “3-D” version of reality, the words alone may not cut it. Try to feel into what I’m saying, or try listening to the podcast; hearing it just may do the trick, if the written word doesn’t.)

If it’s a passion that pulls you “up and out”, removing you from your sense of center, and causing you to forget your heart’s values (something your heart will signal to you at once, if you can hear it over the din of your excitement), then it’s a passion of diversion. The aspects of you that don’t want to stay in one place are latching on the “bright, shiny object” passing by in order to try to recapture that juicy feeling that passion can bring.

But, because your heart goes sour with this kind of passion, it’s not going to fulfill you in the way you’re hoping it will.

On the other hand, if the passion you feel is grounding, expanding, and strikes deep into the heart of who you are, then it’s a passion of deepening. A long lost aspect of you, something that needs to be rekindled, is calling out from the depths of your soul, saying, “Yes… remember me.”

The timbre of a passion of deepening has a quality to it that’s like (as cliche as it sounds) coming home. But better, and different.

It’s like that line in Sleepless in Seattle (love that movie; and thanks to Movie Quotes for helping me remember its source), when Tom Hanks was recalling the love he shared with his wife:

“It’s like coming home, only to no home I’ve ever known.”

There’s a familiarity to a passion of deepening, but also a newness, and a sense of discovery, and that takes it beyond just “trying to recapture the past.” It makes you excited and thinking of the future, sure… but it also makes you feel more “you” than before.

A Spiritual Look at Passion

Volumes have been written about this, but the take-home message, as I see it, is this:

Love is the ultimate connector — because in love, a merging happens. You cease to see distance or differences between you and that which you love. And that is the spiritual journey all of us are on, regardless of chosen path: to be at One.

In a commentary on the writings of the famous Sufi author Ibn ‘Arabi, I found this passage:

Hence he states explicitly and repeatedly that the goal of the Sufi path is not, as some people imagine, “reaching God”, since, in the final analysis, God cannot be reached. What the Sufis are really out to achieve is not oneness with God, but felicity.

There’s much more to it, of course, than just being happy — but happiness is an indication that you’re on the right course.

So, should Elena deny her passion, or follow it?

The answer will only come when she looks inside, trusting her intuition, and feels the timbre of her passion. As Jung said:

Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart…. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.

Want to ramp up your passion? Need help on the intuition piece? The Freedom Teleseminar Offer just may the ticket you need. Click here to see the details.

And as of the day I’m posting this (Oct. 30), you’ve got 8 days to get in on the drawing for a year’s free consulting (with me, of course).

Want a podcast of this? Click here.

Image by “The Alieness” on Flickr, via Creative Commons license.

And thanks to all those who commented on the previous post so far: Carson, Slade Roberson, MichelleVan

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2007. | Permalink | 11 comments

And as painful a lesson as that was, it wasn’t the most profound lesson I learned there. But it was the most practical.

I’m a big believer in practical spirituality. As much as I love conceptual spiritual study — geeking out on the nuances of the theories of free will, self-direction, and hearts and souls (I’ve got a double grand trine in air, after all) — it’s the practical side of the spiritually-infused life that really puts my heart at rest.

Practical spirituality, to me, is how your spiritual studies directly impact and influence the way you live your life in the most seemingly mundane of ways. You could say it’s the “shoes” of life — the support that a sturdy spiritual orientation gives you in tackling the challenges and tasks of your existence.

Now, that might seem a bit odd to some; to think of the spiritual existence as a foundation for life, when so often the spiritual is thought of as the pinnacle of life, supported by the worldly. As if the dense, worldly life is the base, and the ethereal, spiritual life forms the “higher” parts of life. But I’ve found that model to lead to all sorts of problems.

Spiritual time vs. everything else.

When your spiritual life is floating above the rest, it’s too easy to get ungrounded, and make your spiritual pursuits separate from the rest of your life. Spiritual time vs. everything else. Spiritual concerns get disconnected from survival, from family, from health, and from all the so-called “practical” aspects of life, in that spiritual fulfillment gets prioritized above them, and sought without regard to how the rest of your life is flowing.

However, if you flip that model upside-down, it can make life so much richer.

What if you brought your spiritual connection into your worldly activities, instead of separating them out?

Last week at the retreat I worked at, there was a night when everyone was engaged in a night of prayer, all night long. It’s a wonderful experience, and I’ve done it numerous times. But this time, I was alone in the kitchen, cubing watermelons, slicing oranges, cracking twelve dozen eggs for the next morning’s breakfast, etc.

As I worked alone in the kitchen, I sang and prayed. My heart rejoiced in the simplicity of my work: my chance to be present with my experience of the Divine while I worked in the service of others. I wasn’t praying with the group, but I had a fantastic, spiritually rich night.

I didn’t leave the worldly to experience the spiritual. Instead, I allowed the spiritual to form the basis of how I went about the worldly. You could say that my work had “a great pair of shoes”; fantastic support to accomplish my tasks in a way that fed my heart (and not leave me in a world of hurt).

More and more, I’m finding this pattern showing up in my life, and I believe it’s the integration of the studies I’ve been engaged in coming home to roost, so to speak.

So, two points of awareness for you:

1. Where do you tend to separate your experience of the spiritual from the worldly?
2. How can your spiritual experiences support your worldly activities even more?

Want a podcast of this? Click here.

Image by Celinet on Flickr, via Creative Commons license.

And thanks to all those who commented on the previous post so far: Isabella Mori, Barry Morris, Coach Anne, Michelle Van, Joanna Young, Jean Browman, Roslyn Hoetawa, Tshombe, Jason, Debbie Perkins, Mark Silver, Molly Gordon, John, May, Erin Ferree, Judy Murdoch, Gayle, Shawn Murphey, Judith Geiger, Anne Wayman, Carmen, Kim Cavins, Char Brooks, Nathan, Maryam Reimer

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2007. | Permalink | 13 comments

When you need specialized knowledge to accomplish a task (like learning CSS, NVC, or intuition), or you’re just curious about something (flamenco guitar, 17th century naval frigates, or how to grow better cucumbers), then learning lifts you up. The more you learn, the more full you feel, and the richer your life becomes.

But when you’re learning something new because you feel deficient as a person without it, “less than”, or are driven by a compulsion to appear better than someone else, then you might as well be trying to fill in the Grand Canyon with a teaspoon. Because no matter how much knowledge you accumulate, you’ll never feel full.

And here’s the kicker: the same lesson applies to learning as it does to material wealth, food, affection, or just about anything you can think of.

Why? Because it’s not about the stuff. It’s about the intention driving you.

True intent: curiosity, fun… specialized knowledge to accomplish a task… genuine hunger.
False intent: believing you’re deficient… needing more to be okay… comparison-driven desires.

What’s the big deal? Why does this matter?

When your actions are driven by false intentions, it’s like trying to feed an insatiable hunger. No matter how much you learn (or earn, or eat), the hole of that fear can never be filled in.

Not to mention the time, energy, and resources spent trying to fill in the hole that could be better spent enjoying the rest of your life.

So what do you do?

When you find yourself off on another wild goose chase, ask yourself, “WHY am I doing this? What am I hoping to gain?” That is, if you succeed, what will that give you?

If you’re fueled by true intent, the answer will be something like, “Because it brings me joy,” or, “Because I’ll be able to do what I couldn’t do before.” And the feeling behind the words will be one that lifts your heart.

If you’re being driven by false intent, however, the answer will be something like, “Because then everything will be okay,” or, “Then I can relax and just enjoy myself,” or, “Because then I’ll be enough,” or, “Because then so-and-so won’t get ahead of me” (Whoa — she’s going down in smoke!). And the feeling behind the words will be one of stress, pressure, compulsion, or fear.

(If you need some help in shifting from false to true, this would be a great place to start…)

The driver is the key

We’re all driven by something in life. The more clear you are about what’s driving you, the more you’ll be able to not only be effective, but find the peace and fulfillment that life offers within every opportunity.

Want a podcast of this? Click here.

Image by are you my rik? at Flickr, via Creative Commons license.

And thanks to all those who commented on the previous post so far: Edward Mills, Jean Browman, Adam, communicatrix, K-L, Lyman Reed, Julie

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2007. | Permalink | 12 comments