I’m in a conversation over at Colleen Wainwright’s Communicatrix blog, which started with her productivity tips, but has evolved into the essence of being a Virgo (she and I are both Virgos, as are Dawud Miracle and Mark Silver, who also weighed in).

Add to the mix an email I got from Jennifer Louden (of ComfortQueen.com), about the lighten-ing effect of self-acceptance, and we’ve got the makings of one of the most primal teachings in all of mysticism.

The inherent goodness of the Universe.

Don’t worry, I’m not going to spout a bunch of platitudes on you. This is really some base-level, practical mojo we’re talking about.

In fact, as a healer, I regularly saw that at the beginning of someone’s spiritual journey, it was this core lesson that they needed the most. Once they got this piece, the rest of whatever they needed to heal could happen much easier.

What does the ‘Virgo conversation’ and self-acceptance have to do with the inherent goodness of the Universe?

Let’s start with Jennifer’s message:

If all those self-help books and tapes and articles worked, we’d all be size Zero, gourmet-cooking, multi-lingual millionaires, right?

What DOES work is self-love, self-acceptance, and self-care. And since you are absolutely, positively wonderful just the way you are, celebrate the first annual Freedom from Self-Improvement Day: May 15, 2007.

I want to highlight that sentence: “you are absolutely, positively wonderful just the way you are.” Now, it’s one thing to be able to say that. It’s another to actually feel it, believe it, and live as if that reality is absolutely real in you.

In Sufism, the most plentiful aspect of the Divine is Beneficence, Graciousness, Love, Compassion, Benevolence, and Generosity (all these are approximate translations, since English doesn’t have one word that sums it up in quite the same way). That goodness “encompasses all things,” and is, “bestowed upon all creatures with no disparity.”

And as simple as this sounds, it’s one of the toughest to learn.

Why? Because we believe otherwise, based on our experiences in life. We’ve been beaten down, told we’re less than, and had things (apparently) not work out for us so many times, we start to believe in other than goodness.

And yet, the truth of it is, underneath all the pain and separation we’ve been led to believe is real, the Really Real is the Oneness, the connecting power of the Divine (whatever you want to call it). It’s the call of the heart that always brings us home.

Ask any mystic or any healer worth their salt, and they’ll confirm for you that the bottom-line of every situation is always the loving presence of Oneness.

Once you get that — I mean, really get that — then your world view can’t help but improve. Competition gives way to collaboration. Difficult situations become opportunities to learn what the Divine has in store for you. And every patron in your business becomes a beloved who has been brought to you to become enriched, and your life gets enriched by them.

And, a bit closer to home:

When you grok that at the core of who you are, you originated from (and are a part of) that essential goodness, then self-acceptance becomes much, much easier.

Personally, I struggled for a long time with self-esteem issues. I tried so many ways of proving my worth and healing what I thought was broken in me. But what truly tipped the scales was not “fixing something broken”, but recognizing my inherent connectedness. I started to see integrity (as in ‘wholeness’, not ‘acting consistently’) was not something I had to earn or find, but something to be remembered and recognized.

Then, acceptance of my Virgo-inspired desires for neatness (too commonly disparaged as “perfectionism”) became simple — this was my heart’s desire to merge with the orderliness of the Universe.

As Jennifer says:

Beating ourselves up because our thighs aren’t thin enough, or because we still haven’t perfected the art of “positive thinking”, hasn’t made us happier or the world a better place. The biggest paradox in trying to change ourselves is that nothing happens until we embrace who and how we are right now, imperfections, perceived flaws and all.

And I would add: “Because when you stop pushing away who you are, you can get close enough to yourself to recognize that you are all you need to be.”

And yes, I promised practicality…

In case you aren’t seeing this already, self-acceptance (and its origin, the perspective of essential goodness) is at the core of having a business people love. Because not only is that kind of perspective contagious, it’s magnetic — when you see the beauty in all things, people feel seen and accepted on a very profound level by you. They’ll be drawn to be with you, to learn from you, to spend time with you.

My recommendation, then, is to spend some time asking yourself, “How do I see the Universe (or creation, or whatever word you want to put in there)? Do I see it as primarily based on love, or something else?”

It’s an illuminating exercise, believe me. And, I’d love to hear what you come up with.

Image by jurvetson.

And thanks to all who commented on the previous post: Brett Evans, Liz Strauss, Tara, Wendy Piersall, Ellen Moore, Carolyn Manning, Dave Olson

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2007. | Permalink | 22 comments