Want to know the reason? The way most people do it, it’s boring as hell.

Let me ask you this: are you strapping yourself onto the same machine as the day before, hitting the same buttons you did the day before, and doing the same workout you did the day before? And where did this workout come from?

I’ll bet you in came from one of these three sources:

• an article in a magazine,
• it’s what the person behind the desk showed you on your tour when you signed up, or
• it’s what everyone else is doing.

Most people copy others because they have no idea what to do, and figure that if it’s good for the gander, it’ll be good enough to get their goose in gear, too.

We progress when we learn...

The problem with this is obvious.

How many of the people on the elliptical machines at your gym look and perform the way you wish you could? Not many, at my gym.

At the gym I work out at, between two and ten people inhabit the ellipticals, treadmills, and step-bike-contraptions every morning… and then there’s me, over in the free weight area. Alone.

And you know how much better those two to ten people look today, compared to when I joined, a year and a half ago? None. Some even look worse.

But, I’ve lost 15 20 pounds, and I’m strong as two of my former selves put together. I barely recognize my own muscles in the mirror. Oh, I’m not going to win any contests, and I rarely even turn a head these days (blame it on being “follicularly challenged”, 38 years old, and not particularly broad-shouldered), but I’ll be damned if I don’t have muscles in places I never knew I could.

Now, am I particularly gifted? Special? Is my uncle Jack LaLanne or something? Heck no… I’m a reformed fat kid from a sedentary family who’s had to work at it all my life. But, I’ve got one thing that many people don’t display much of, at least when it comes to the gym: a willingness to learn.

You Gotta Keep On Stepping

I got fascinated by the human body, and what it’s capable of, when I was fifteen years old. Maybe it was because I resembled a human jello mold, and athletes are just so… athletic… but I was hooked. I read everything I could get a hold of in the pre-information age, which meant I read Arnold’s Encyclopedia of Modern Bodybuilding from cover to cover three times a week.

I knew when I was 16 that I wanted to open a gym someday. I went to college, not really knowing what I was doing there, but lucky for me, UC San Diego had a small Physical Education department in those days, and I was able to squeak out a minor in PhysEd before the department got budget-cut. Somewhere along the line I talked myself out of the gym-ownership idea, but stayed active (after losing 35 pounds my senior year of high school, I bounced around a few collegiate sports, like water polo and rowing, and then played a few sports recreationally and exercised solo after that), and kept studying.

I took some amazing classes, read some amazing books, and tried some amazing (and not so amazing) workout routines, until finally landing on CrossFit.com in October of 2007. I’ve been glued to the CF community ever since, and I still feel like a rank beginner at times. (And yes, my goal of opening my own gym is back on. Look out, baby.)

To get through the hardest journey we need take only one step at a time, but we must keep on stepping. — Chinese proverb 

Sheeple no more!

Bottom line: You’ve got to take responsibility for your progress, or lack thereof.

In any aspect of your life, be it fitness, business, relationships, or whatever, if you aren’t learning, you’re standing still. Now, if you’re happy with the level you’ve reached, that’s fine… but if you recognize that your journey isn’t over yet, then it’s time to get busy.

Whenever you think you’ve stopped learning, it’s all over; remember that! — James Fitzgerald, aka OPT

If there’s anything I want you to take away from this post, it’s this: You are capable of much more than you think you are. What does that mean, practically speaking? It means that if you aren’t happy with your bodyfat percentage, or your current vocation, or the way you speak to your kids, then do something about it!

Start reading. Subscribe to feeds, newsletters, and podcasts. Take a class. Interview someone who knows what you want to know (it has been my experience that most people are glad to share what they know, if you only ask). Volunteer.

And if you come up to me at the gym and ask me how to squat, I’ll grin wider than a giraffe and be happy to teach you. I guarantee it’ll be fun, as well as hard… although I’ll probably talk your ear off, too, about why the elliptical machine sucks, so be ready.

Image (of my friend Amie!) by greg westfall

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© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 6 comments

Wouldn’t you rather do amazing things with your life? You can. And one of the ways to make sure you do is to preserve your sanity by not acting like a rat, and doing the things that will set you free. How? Genius Time.

Genius Time, in a nutshell, is about building time that’s for you and your most important things into your schedule.

Want to make stuff this cool? Genius time, baby. Genius time.

Sounds simple, huh? Hardly.

I’ve seen this idea talked about most often by “Creatives” — folks who do creative work for other people, like designers, artists, etc. If Creatives aren’t careful, they can spend all their time and energy working on client projects, and not have any juice left over for their own business.

But it’s not just for Creatives. Everyone needs genius time.

What is Genius Time?

Genius time, as I’m defining it, is time for you to focus on what you personally need to focus on more than anything. When talking about your work, it’s often when you work ON your business instead of just IN your business. When talking about your health, it’s when you focus on the thing you need most, whether it’s stress-reducing meditation, or getting to the gym consistently. When talking about relationships, it’s when you carve out the time to do that which matters most, whether that’s working out issues that have come up between you, or spending “quality time” in whatever way you do.

The idea behind Genius Time is also concordant with Pareto’s Principle, aka the 80/20 rule. Genius time is often when you focus on that 20% of whatever it is, because if you don’t, the whole thing falls apart.

How much Genius Time do you need?

Start with a half-hour a day, if you have to. Heavens, you should be able to set aside at least that much, but if an hour is too scary to contemplate in the beginning, start with half. Eventually, you’ll want to work your way up to two hours, at least.

Most people these days, when confronted with the idea of finding more time in their days, tend to either shrug and dismiss the possibility, or get vehement about why that’s impossible. “My days are crammed as they are!”, or, “I get up at 4am and go to bed at 11pm as it is!” To you, I say:

Get a grip, or be gripped.

Because if you can’t find a half an hour, you’re seriously gripped. Life’s got you by the short-n-curlies… but do you want to know how you got there?

It’s your own darn fault.

Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but you haven’t taken responsibility for your actions if you’re playing the victim about your schedule. You, and you alone, have chosen to live the way you’re living. And that means that you can change it.

I hope that no one reading this is in that situation, because I hope you’ve moved beyond that phase of your life where you perceive life as happening to you rather than through you… but if you are, get some help. Now. Start here.

Got your life back? Good; let’s continue.

How to get your Genius Time

First, you’ve got to carve in a block of time. By “carve in”, I mean that you’ve got to build it into your schedule as if it’s completely indispensible (which it is), and make it inviolable. (The corollary, as in, “carve out”, is how most people think about it. As if life is full, and you need to squeeze something else in. Basic rule: Don’t be “most people.”) Otherwise, you’ll run the risk of pushing it aside when the seemingly urgent matters of life want to intrude.

It’s just how financial experts talk about the “Pay yourself first” rule: if you don’t, the money disappears into a crack somewhere. It’s inevitable.

So, Genius Time has to be a top priority.

Next rule: no distractions. Turn off the phone, close TweetDeck (under no circumstances should Genius Time and twitter time ever—EVER—coincide), and lock the door if you have to. For the next half-hour/hour/two hours, the rest of the world can wait.

Now, on to the meat.

What do you do in Genius Time?

Short answer: whatever you have to.

It could be:

• meditating
• writing blog posts
• researching your next career move
• studying
• walking through the park (sometimes it’s easier to get your head clear when in motion)
• practicing your intuition skills
• kicking your feet up on your desk and daydreaming of how you want to spend the next half of your life
• anything else that’s critical to your well-being, or the well-being of your career

Obviously, that last one is a pretty broad definition, but that’s the idea; do what you have to do to be the person you need to be.

And if you don’t take Genius Time?

In the words of my high school English teacher, Mr. Engfeldt…

Don't be a mental weiner dog.

… you’ll become a mental weiner dog. Seriously. Don’t tempt fate like that.

Images by phill.d and hellvet2000.

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© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 8 comments

Now, I’ll be the first to admit they do look a bit odd at first…

If you aren\'t seeing the embedded video, click here to view.

… but they feel amazing, and you get used to them really quick.

You may have heard of Vibram Five Fingers before; they’re definitely making the rounds among the kind of people who know a good thing when they see it (heck, there’s even a site completely devoted to them!). But if you haven’t, I highly encourage you to try them. Why?

Because they’re ultra-comfy.

I’ve always loved being barefoot, from being a kid at the beach to playing grass volleyball in college. I always take my shoes off indoors, and I love the warm seasons because it means I can get away with flip-flops most days. Wearing shoes is like wearing a tie; in some situations you have to do it, but if I had my druthers, those days would be few and far between.

With VFF’s, though, you can go anywhere you need to, and it feels like you’re barefoot. And because they’re so light, even after a day of walking everywhere, your feet feel great. No more tired ol’ dogs.

You feel more connected to your environment.

When I walk on any surface, I can feel it intimately. Seriously: the second day I had them we went to the movies, and I got grossed out because I could feel the stickiness of the carpet. (But, even on sharp gravel, the sole is enough to protect you from feeling any pain, so you can walk around relaxed.)

Your feet get stronger.

Think about it: for millions of years, we’ve been barefoot. How were we able to run after mastodons, trek over mountains, and still survive if we hobbled along, muttering, “Ouch! Ooch! Oaff!” every time we stepped on a rock? Because we didn’t, that’s why. When you go barefoot, your feet adapt. The ligaments, tendons, and musculature of your feet are strengthened by walking and running barefoot. It’s the wearing of shoes that weakens your feet, by doing the work that your feet should be doing for themselves.

I hike in the mountains wearing these shoes, and four days a week, I do my CrossFit workouts in them. Whether I’m Olympic lifting, sprinting, or doing any of the myriad of exercises I do in CF and the M.E.B.B. protocol I follow, I haven’t had any problems doing them in my VFF’s.

If you’re planning to run in them, I highly recommend easing into it. I started learning POSE running while wearing other shoes, and it took some time to strengthen my feet and calves to the point where I could run without a lot of soreness. When I switched over to the Five Fingers, the technique was much easier, but I was glad I had built up my strength as much as I had. And now, running in them is a joy. My feet/calves almost never get sore, and I can’t explain how great it feels to run without big, clompy shoes weighing me down.

Now, it’s not all sunshine and roses…

The only complaint I have about them is that, well, they stink. After all, I don’t wear socks with them, and after all that exercise, they can get pretty funky. I’ve scoured many online forums where people talk about them, looking for a good solution, and this is what I’ve come up with:

• Clean them after every use. It only takes a couple of minutes, and it’s well worth it.
• I spray them with Trader Joe’s Cedarwood & Sage All-Purpose Cleaner, and Earth Day Products’ “Everyday Stain & Odor Remover”, letting each one sit for a few minutes before rinsing them out and spraying the other. When the weather is warm, they’ll dry on their own pretty quickly, but in the winter, I prop them up against a fan and let them “blow dry” that way.

(If you’re a VFF wearer, and you’ve found something that cleans them well, please leave a comment and share your secret!)

They’re not for going incognito in.

The first time I got asked about my bizarre shoes was within ten minutes of buying them, and the interest hasn’t slowed much (just imagine when I get the red ones!). When people see these shoes, they almost often stare, and the more adventurous ones will strike up a conversation, asking me where I got them, what the story is behind them, and if I love them.

And of course, the answer is always yes.

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© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 10 comments

Now, don’t be afraid of fear—that’s a scary thought!—just learn to recognize it for what it is.

And now, on with our story.

The search for inner peace led John to a group of other like-minded people who also saught the same thing, all rallied around a teacher who demonstrated some very successful techniques to help his students find and experience that peace. As the group grew, the teacher realized that he must establish a “method”, so others could teach the work as well. After all, what good would it do unless a means could be identified? And so, this method became concretized, shared, and taught to many more seekers of peace.

John, who believed the methods and the community around it to be the best thing he’d ever seen, became a teacher of this system. He taught others the methods, used them himself, and his life got better.

But then, a shadow began to grow…

As the organization grew, John started to see a resistance to new input and ideas. The results of what was once an “open spirit of exploration” began to become doctrine. Legends began to permeate the group, telling of the brilliance—nay, the infallibility—of the leaders, and the miracles they performed on a regular basis. The method became dogma, and those who challenged it were outcast.

John began to become disillusioned with his teacher, the methods, and the organization. He saw brilliant, dedicated teachers ostracized because they spoke out in opposition to the leaders. He watched as the methods became stale, outdated, and both inflexible in their approach and limited in their application and efficacy.

And so, John left.

History has a way of repeating itself, doesn’t it?

After a time of introspection and idea gathering, John decided to follow a different life-long passion, changing professions and moving on with his life. He trained, he learned, and he worked, and he was happy.

Eventually he came across another community, steeped in the pursuit of the same passions as he, and once again he found himself feeling at home. But as John grew, developed his talents, and learned more, he began to hear stories of disgruntled members within the community that seemed to be having experiences that mirrored his past. John began to question his involvement in the community after seeing the same kinds of rigidity and fear creeping into the organization.

Too bad I’m not Mother Goose.

Now, wouldn’t it be nice if this were a fairy tale, with a beginning and an end, neatly tied up in a bow of clear-cut morals and easily deciphered lessons? Maybe it would. But life isn’t a storybook fable, and rarely are decisions as easy to make as they might appear. Black-and-white quickly turns to grey in the real world.

Like yours, the ending of John’s story isn’t yet written. He can’t see the end, doesn’t know how things will turn out, and can’t rely on a crystal ball, fairy godmother, or all-seeing wizard. He, like you, has to make decisions based on heart, head, and gut.

But he, like you, can choose how to respond to life’s events proactively rather than reactively, based on principles and decisions about how he wants to live his life.

Looking at the experiences of his life, and the examples of those leaders John sees around him, he comes to a few conclusions:

• when you become afraid to challenge the status quo, you stagnate.
• if you aren’t willing to sacrifice your conclusions in favor of new evidence that contradicts it, then you’ve stopped learning.
• resist the temptation to label those who express deviation as deviants.
• there is strength and safety in numbers… but there is also a greater propensity for delusion (aka “groupthink.”)

Charles Du Bos had it right when he said,

The important thing is this: To be ready at any moment to sacrifice what you are for what you could become.

Because when your status, income, and success depend on you being what you’ve built, it’s scary to let it go. That fear drives irrational decisions.

However, another choice exists.

Look around you at examples of personal excellence. They may be a little less obvious, and thus a bit harder to find, than the grand commercial successes that so often get the publicity, but they’re there. They aren’t always mutually exclusive, of course, but the popular vote doesn’t always reward excellence (at least not right away).

Of course, these measures are largely subjective, because your criteria for excellence may be different than the next person’s, but since we’re talking about John, here , we’ll share the traits he feels are indicative of personal integrity:

• humility. (Confucius said, “Humility is the solid foundation of all virtues.”)
• willingness to abandon what you’ve known for what you know is right.
• an enduring quest for greater growth and understanding.

Rabindranath Tagore said it well:

Truth comes as conqueror only to those who have lost the art of receiving it as friend.

Because when you realize that your status, income, and success can also truly depend on what you stand for, it doesn’t make change any less scary, but it can make it liberating.

How to avoid the crumbling of your own empire

There’s a great analogy that I’m sure you’ve heard, which likens people to buses: Each of us has a number of personalities, emotions, and voices within us. What makes the difference in how we live is which one we let control us, i.e. “drive our bus.”

I said in the beginning that I believe fear to be the driving force behind every bad decision we ever make. That doesn’t make fear “bad”, of course; it’s a necessary part of who we are, and most of us wouldn’t survive long without it. Just don’t let it drive the bus when it shouldn’t be.

When fear drives the bus, we lose perspective. Input we should be open to gets shut out, and we get rigid and inflexible in our thinking, if not more.

So, when something comes along that gets your knickers up in knots, ask yourself, “Is it my fear that is creating this situation, or is this a genuine threat?” And if you’re having a hard time figuring it out, see if you can discern what your reasoning is telling you is at stake. If you “give in”, what does it mean for you? Loss of face? More work? Or something real?

Growing something—anything—is a process that will take you and your beliefs to task more than you’d expect. But, if you can remain true to the values you started with, even in the face of your greatest demons, you can far exceed your wildest expectations, and be proud of what you accomplish.

Image by h.koppdelaney.

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© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 3 comments

So, you can imagine that I’m always on the lookout for ways to sneak coconut into all kinds of recipes… and I found one recently. It was good to start with, but a little coconut took it over the edge.

Beautiful, aren't they? Photo (and another variation) © DinnerCakes.com

“Fauxtatoes” are the name I came up with for these yummy puppies after we made them a few times, because the consistency is pretty much exactly like mashed potatoes. And, they’re the closest I’ll get to eating ‘taters, since I’m a Primal guy, through and through.

Here’s the recipe:

• 1 head o’ cauliflower, chopped however
• 32oz chicken stock
• 4-5 garlic cloves, peeled

… all in a big pot, adding water to just about cover the cauli, boil for about 15 minutes until it softens up a bit. Depending on how thick your pieces are, it may take 20-25 minutes. It’s all good, though.

Drain off the liquid, and mash it all up—if you have a hand blender, by all means use it—adding:

• a splash of coconut milk
• butter (no, you do not measure this. trust me… just add butter, and then add some more)
• salt & pepper to taste

Yum!

Now, these are tasty, with or without the coconut milk. But what kind of coconut addict would I be if I didn’t add some?

I’d love to hear what you think if you try these, especially if you play around with the spices some… I’m more than happy with how these have come out, but I’d be open to experimentation (curry? herbs de provence? ginger?)

Bon appetit!

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© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 3 comments

Like a baby bird chirping desperately for its mother’s return to the nest to bring the food that will keep it alive, there is a yearning that lives within you, and it calls incessantly. It can be satiated with the smallest of moments, and it has a camel’s resistance to thirst, but if you ignore it too long, it will shrivel and die.

And as it does, color will fade from your world. Meaning will ebb away, enjoyment will wither, and you’ll sit around trying to remember a time in your life when richness existed. You’ll get dry, stiff… and when you hardly recognize the crusty you that you’ve become, you’ll chalk it up to being busy. Or being a parent. Or being a professional. Or getting older.

But it has nothing to do with any of those things.

The Urgent Call is your spirit’s need for connection. Like the migrating herds of the plains of Africa, who travel thousands of miles every year in search of life-giving food and water, your spirit has an essential drive to feel its connection to all around it. It’s the reason we seek community. It’s the reason we search for purpose and meaning in life. It’s the reason we feel better when we’re on a spiritual path, and it’s the reason that it doesn’t really matter what path that ends up being.

What matters is that you connect.
What matters is the Urgent Call gets listened to.
It doesn’t matter how your Urgent Call gets fulfilled, only that it does.

Mind Schmind

Oh, sure, your rational mind wants to be right, it wants everything to make logical sense, and it wants reasoning to explain your beliefs. And those things are fine… for the mind. But the Call doesn’t need those things (which is why it’s doubted and ridiculed so often); the Call just needs connection.

The evidence for this is that this post makes sense to you. Logically? Reasonably? Heck no. Your left brain probably doesn’t have a clue in hell what I’m talking about, and it’s going a little nutso trying to figure out where this is going, matching patterns and looking for a logical conclusion. In fact, it’s probably liking this little explanation, because it can understand it. “Ahh,” it says, “I’m feeling much more comfortable now that you’re speaking my language.”

Left brain loves that this post is probably going to talk about life purpose, or pursuing your passions, or finding what juices you up and going for it. It’s hoping that I’m going to end this post with a three- or five-step process, a witty conclusion, or steps to finding your personal mission statement.

Hey, left brain: F off. This is not for you.

This is for the part of you that cries at sentimental commercials. It’s for the part of you that honors the life and struggle of the smallest spider crawling up your wall. It’s for the part of you that totally gets fed by a moving musical performance, a selfless act of service, or a hug.

If you aren\'t seeing the embedded video, click here to view.

It’s for the part of you that can have all the material things you want in this world, have a great job, eat fabulous food, vacation regularly, drive an expensive car, want for nothing… and still want. Here’s a tip: it’s not the stuff of this world that answers your Urgent Call… it’s the space between the stuff. More accurately, it’s that the space gets seen, felt, and honored.

One moment of touch can do it. One breath of togetherness. One searching call into the great unknown, and the guaranteed answer that returns. Sure, you have to be open to calling, and be open to receive the answer, but it only takes a drop of connection for the momentum of your life to turn around and point you back on the road to fulfillment.

If you’ve been feeling empty lately, as if the world has gone gray-scale, or that you’re just missing something, then now you know what you need to do. Stop looking outside. Stop looking for things to stuff into the hole, because no amount of Dolce & Gabbana, Crate & Barrel, or Ben & Jerry’s is going to do the trick this time. You’re going to have to quiet your mind, stop listening to the fluff, and listen to the essential, the primordial, the ancient.

Make the Call. It’s the only thing that’s going to work.

Image by ~MVI~.

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© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 4 comments

I’ve mentioned this before, but I still have conversations with people all the time where I mention Evernote, and they say, “Huh?” And that just blows my mind.

And the latest reason why I love them? Because not only have they produced the most awesome, flexible, useful piece of organizational software around, they also have a great sense of humor. That’s rare, people.

If you aren\'t seeing the embedded video, click here to view.

What I use Evernote for, just to give you a heads-up:

• managing all my client projects
• storing any and all info I find while out searching the interwebs
• recording all my recipes
• brainstorm-rain collection
• notes about places we’re thinking of moving to or visiting
• read the second one again, and let it sink in. Seriously.
• essentially everything I want to remember/record/store for the future, on subjects like WordPress, web design, CrossFit, nutrition, spirituality, personal development, family stuff, marketing, copywriting, and more.

Seriously, if you haven’t checked out Evernote, you’re bonkers. It’s awesome. It’s life-transforming. And—hello?—it’s free! Come on, now, people! Go get you some.

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© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 3 comments

As Autumn approaches, so do my urges to clean house

And as much as “cleaning” has been associated with the Spring, I tend to do a big cleanup and realignment of priorities in the Autumn. Maybe it’s the product of going to school every Fall from age 5 to 35 (K-college, then grad school and teaching seminars). Or maybe I’m getting ready for hibernation; who knows.

On my docket now are reviews of two products I’ve promised to do, but let slide in the face of busy-ness and upheaval. That’s not to diminish the value of the products, by any means; I thought they were great, each in their own way, and in their own intended use. (Okay, enough jabbering – on with the show!)

The Shadow Effect

Thanks to CK Reyes and Michelle Vandepas at Conscious Livelihood, I got a copy of Debbie Ford’s The Shadow Effect, which I was excited to see because even though I’d heard many good things about Debbie and her work over the years, I’ve never really had the chance to see her approach to healing up close. (For those of you who don’t know it, I was an energetic healer and intuitive for over ten years.)

The Shadow Effect is the video I wish I had when I was working as a healer. Debbie takes a very “normal people” approach when she explains how our inner voices and patterns, despite our best intentions, can slow us down and sabotage our progress in all sorts of ways. To be honest, I was afraid this would be an overly New-Agey production, but it was something I could show my parents, and they’d get it completely. And that’s the ultimate litmus test, isn’t it?

If you aren\'t seeing the embedded video, click here to view.

The amazing thing about the movie is not just the celebs that appear (from Deepak Chopra to Marianne Williamson), or the exceptional production quality, or the normal-ness of the language and processes used to get inside your own head and debug your life. What blew me away was that they have made a “Special Interactive Edition” of the movie that, much like The Secret, covers all the groundwork you need to understand what they’re saying… and a second version that’s filled with guided processes and exercises that take it from conceptual to experiential and practical. The second DVD is a full 40 minutes longer than the first, and walks you step-by-step through the same kinds of awareness-based healing techniques I learned when I went to my healing school.

I admit, I was pretty nervous when I heard the title, “The Shadow Effect”, because I thought it would be all about embracing the darkness within, and using its power to feel strong (yes, I’ve seen people out there doing that work, and way worse). Luckily, it wasn’t like that at all. Instead, it gently shows how our “shadows”—the parts of us we’ve been told aren’t valuable, or wanted, and yet still exist within us—shouldn’t be feared or pushed away, because they hold the key to a much greater understanding and acceptance of who we are. And, as we are able to come to terms with the experiences we’ve had and how they’ve shaped us, a whole new world of possibility opens up.

In short, if you’re someone who is just getting started on your personal growth journey, or is interested in learning more about how to deal with your own issues that you know have been tripping you up in your life, then I recommend you check out The Shadow Effect, because it was made for you.

The Shadow Effect is available in DVD format, as well as a watch-it-online format, but I’d recommend getting the Special Interactive Edition, for all the reasons I mentioned above.

Or, You Can F#@% Therapy

On the other end of the spectrum is an e-book called F#@% Therapy, which is perfect for people who are either skeptical of all the self-appointed gurus they see on Twitter these days, or just want a no-nonsense approach to living a better life, without all the fluff.

Covering a whole slew of topics from clutter to procrastination to “keeping up with the Joneses”, as well as the programming we’ve had drummed into us since we were kids, F#@% Therapy is an approach that’s actually more soft and gentle than you’d think, given the title (once you’ve become desensitized to the F-bombs, that is).

If you aren\'t seeing the embedded video, click here to view.

Again, I was surprised by what I found inside, because based on the title, who knows what to expect? In the author’s own words,

F#@% Therapy isn’t for everyone–it’s for the people that’d never ever read a self help book.

At the same time, though, I wouldn’t discourage folks like me who’ve been around personal development for years, and are tired of the fru-fru, woo-woo bull**** that’s waaay too prevalent these days, from getting their hands on a copy and taking a look.

Because there’s a lot out there on the interwebs these days that requires you to adopt an entire philosophy in and of itself, or commit to a monster-sized program just to see results (much the way GTD can feel for newcomers to the productivity world). But it can get exhausting to continually adopt new entire paradigms just to get stuff done.

I see F#@% Therapy as a wake-up call to all the garbage, over-thought, for-the-sake-of-itself drivel in the self-help market these days. It’s a straightforward approach that doesn’t claim to be anything other than what it is, and in that way, it’s refreshing.

So, what kind of cleaning up do you have to do?

If you’ve been feeling a need for greater self-exploration, or doing some internal house-cleaning, then these just might be some possibilities you’d like to look more into.

Image by moogs.
Disclosure: There are affiliate links in this post, not all of which are mine. Use ‘em, or not, I don’t mind either way. Be free!

Possibly related posts:

• Getting Help Where You Need It: Meditation
• Why It’s Always Time to Learn Something New
• How To Do Amazing Things

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 5 comments

Mmm... steaming hot ramen.

What I enjoyed most about the movie, without giving away too many details, was the main ingredient that Brittany Murphey’s character, Abby, learned to infuse into her ramen that made it special: spirit. Because in the end, this was not a movie about ramen, or romance. It was about finding one’s place in the world by focusing on the how more than the what.

“How” comes from within

The fact that Abby learned to make a great bowl of ramen is secondary to what it required of her to do it. She got the recipe right long before she was able to make a meal that was worthy of being served to her customers, because she was taught that making soup isn’t just about getting a bunch of ingredients and assembling them. It’s about heart. Unless your soup has spirit, it hasn’t got anything.

It’s a lesson that, I believe, resonates for many of us. We spend a lot of time reading books about parachutes or real-life stories of people searching for their “perfect” jobs. We’re taught to believe that if we just find the right career, we’ll be mystically satiated, and we’ll labor away blissfully for the rest of our lives. The emphasis here is placed on the initial discovery, and the promise is that once that discovery is made, the rest is downhill. (If you think about it, this ideal is promulgated in many arenas, from relationships to parenting to politics.)

The Ramen Girl teaches something else, though. It teaches that “getting the recipe right” is only the first step. In order to truly do something well, to transform it from ordinary to exceptional—and to transform yourself in the process—requires an internal contribution that goes beyond meticulousness and hard work. You have to invest yourself in what you’re doing. You have to be willing to be vulnerable, to give of yourself to your patrons through your work. It makes work personal, intimate, and unique.

The Divine is in the Details

As a webdesigner, I can churn out code until the cows come home. I can tweak settings, configure plugins, and customize design details until my fingers turn blue. And in so doing, I can be a good webdesigner, and serve my clients well. I’ll even feel the satisfaction of a job well done. But, is that all I should hope for?

If you want to feel like you’re doing your best work, the scorecard that matters is not the one that can be judged by what shows up on the screen, or on the paper, or in the product. Satisfaction—the bone-deep, spirit-lifting, existential experience of meaning—is found in the value and the interaction of your work and its target. In other words, it’s what your work creates in the experience of another that comes back to you as satisfaction. If it matters, then it matters, no matter what you’re called, from carpenter to coach to CEO.

It’s in the pursuit of that intangible satisfaction that work finds its meaning, we find our purpose, and the path of mastery is made clear. And, at every step of the way, it’s up to you to choose the giving road, the road of excellence, the road of interaction and connection, with your soul laid bare. It may not be easy, but the best things in life rarely come without incredible effort.

Image by bass_nroll.

Possibly related posts:

• The Urgent Call
• How To Do Amazing Things
• Productivity Is A Full-Body Exercise

© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 7 comments

Enter: Primal.

It’s not that CrossFit doesn’t have a nutritional recommendation: it does. And it’s about as simple and clear as it can get: Meat and veggies, nuts and seeds, some fruit, little starch, no sugar. And any CrossFitter worth his/her salt is going to be able to rattle that off like a well-grooved mantra. And, at the same time, knowing what to do and actually doing it are often not the same thing at all.

I’ve read all kinds of fantastic nutritional information before, and have for years, but never have I been able to make it a lifestyle like I have since adopting the “Primal Blueprint Eating Plan” like I have with Mark Sisson, at Mark’s Daily Apple.

Primal living is, in my own words, a prescription for eating the way we’ve evolved to. Our genome has honed itself for over 2 million years, adapting to a particular style of eating that didn’t really fluctuate until about 10,000 years ago. And, since that “recent” shift, we’ve done nothing but go downhill, health-wise, except for the hygienic changes that have increased our average lifespan. It’s pretty clear if you look at how we’ve evolved to eat that it makes a lot of sense to stick close to our own internal genetic recipe. After all, you wouldn’t pour rocket fuel in your car’s gas tank, right? It’s just not designed for it.

Primal living isn’t just about nutrition, though. It’s about the whole grain-free enchilada – fitness, play, rest, and natural living in all sorts of ways. I’m not going to talk all about it, because Mark has already done a fantastic job of that on his blog for the past three years. I’d highly recommend reading this post for a bird’s eye overview, this post if you want a jumping-off point for a bazilion different resources on Primal living, and if you want the clearest explanation of what nutrition is all about, my all-time favorite post about Primal eating is this one right here.

If you like what you see, then the best thing you can do (short of buying Mark’s book) is to sign up for the special Primal Primer newsletter series that he created for this past month’s big Primal challenge. It’s the best, most comprehensive bundle of useful information on your health that I’ve probably ever seen. Seriously.

Now, Here’s Where I Need Your Vote:

As a part of Mark’s month-long Primal Blueprint Health Challenge, there were a number of contests created, ranging from super-simple to more elaborate… including creating a video of a Primal recipe that you love. I made a video of my Primal Coconut Pancakes/Waffles, which you can watch here, and it made it into the contest! Woo hoo!

Now, in order to win the prize, I need your vote – today. It’ll only take about 3 seconds, and would mean the world to me, if you could click to this post here and vote for my video: Primal Coconut Pancakes/Waffles. And, of course, I’d love to hear what you think of them if you make them yourself! (A few people have left comments on the video post, and so far, they’re a hit.)

If you’re curious about anything Primal-related, including my journey that brought me here, or anything about the video or the contest, please don’t hesitate to ask.

UPDATE: Bummer! I lost the contest by four measly votes (185 to 181). Ah well, that’s how the coconut crumbles… for all of you who voted, I appreciate it more than I can say!

Image by alaina.

Possibly related posts:

• Coconut Fauxtatoes
• Pancakes, anyone?
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© Adam for Adam Kayce, 2009. | Permalink | 3 comments