Searching for meaning? Want to know what your purpose is?
Get in line.
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Just kidding!
It’s obvious that there’s no one answer to these kinds of questions. It’s a search, an exploration… one that we all take once bitten by the “significance” bug. It’s a part of living an examined, awake life.
The trick is this: it’s one thing to search… and it’s another to stay sane as you do.
Discovering your purpose isn’t a race.
Instead of adopting the attitude of, “I’ve gotta find it NOW, so I can get going and make it happen!”, with a drive for perfection and a now-I-can-stop-searching-and-just-be-happy attitude, you’ll be far better off taking a page from the book of Japanese aesthetics, and more specifically, the concept of wabi-sabi.
What’s known to millions as a philosophy of "imperfection, impermanence, and incompletion" can keep you from ripping the hair from your head as you walk your walk. (and if you’re curious, mine is shaved, not ripped.)
So, with help from Leonard Koren’s book, Wabi-Sabi: for Artists, Designers, Poets and Philosophers, let’s take a look at some of the principles of wabi-sabi, “a nature-based aesthetic paradigm that restores a measure of sanity and proportion to the art of living,” and how they relate to the search for meaning and purpose.
Slow it down
To experience wabi-sabi means you have to slow down, be patient and look very closely.
In the search for purpose and meaning, I’ve seen an agitated frenzy erupt in some people. “I’ve gotta find my purpose! I don’t know what to do without it!”, or, "I can’t believe I’m x years old, and don’t know what my purpose is yet!" But discovering and living one’s purpose isn’t a pop-a-pill-and-be-done, download-it-now experience.
Just like wabi-sabi, your purpose is something that isn’t jumps up, does a dance, and hollers in your face. It’s often times a glacial process, where bits and pieces get uncovered as you go.
Because sometimes, when you stare at something, you miss it.
Instead, slow down, relax, and get in tune with your self — not the self that takes its cues from the world around it, but the you that you are in the absence of external input. The you that yearns to express itself in its own unique way.
Pare it back
Pare down to the essence, but don’t remove the poetry.
Your purpose is most often simpler than you might think. It’s like a mission statement — the longer and more loquacious they are, the less they’re probably saying. Instead, seek simplicity, much like Guy Kawasaki talks about in reference to "making a mantra" in “Art of the Start” (you can download his manifesto which talks about this from ChangeThis). Rather than drone on endlessly about "adding value through optimized ventures and time-honored blah blah blah", the statement of your purpose can be simple and clear, like, “serving children,” or, “expressing uniqueness through design,” or, “creating beautiful moments.” Wabi-sabi speaks of the power of simplicity, and at its finest, so does your sense of purpose.
Simplicity is at the core of things wabi-sabi. The essence of wabi-sabi, as expressed in tea, is simplicity itself: fetch water, gather firewood, boil the water, prepare tea, and serve it to others.
Let it go
Wabi-sabi is exactly about the delicate balance between the pleasure we get from things and the pleasure we get from freedom from things.
If your search for meaning is about getting something tangible, think again. While knowing your purpose and working from it can result in a more successful business (clarity attracts, if you catch my drift), the main reward of inner lucidity isn’t material, it’s spiritual. Fulfillment, more than fame and fortune, is the pot of gold at the end of this rainbow.
It’s your life, after all
Nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect.
You are a work in progress. Your work is a work in progress. And no matter how good it looks, or how much you convince other people (and yourself) that you’ve "got it all together," the simple truth is that you can’t. And the good news is, you aren’t meant to.
Rather than rail against the messiness that continuous learning precipitates (you mean I have to re-write this ‘About Me’ page again?”), you’ll do far better to accept that you are always evolving. As Soren Kierkegaard said, we are “constantly in the process of becoming.” He also said, “Be that self which one truly is.” (Maybe I need to do a post on ‘The Kierkegaard Search For Purpose’…)
At its core, wabi-sabi is, to me, about recognizing the beauty in what is, so you can step back and appreciate what you have all around you. Not a bad prescription, I think.
Images by suika*2008 (out) and d’n'c.
What a delightful piece of synchronicity! Last weekend my writing/art group chose Wabi-Sabi as the theme for our creative explorations during the next year. I bought Koren’s book in a gift shop called Wabi-Sabi in Taos, NM, four years ago. When I came across it in this post I decided to get it out of my bookshelves, but at first I couldn’t find it. While browsing through the shelves where I was CERTAIN I’d put it, I noticed that my copy of “A Whack on the Side of the Head” was not in the right category section, so I pulled it out to relocate it and there, hiding behind, was Koren’s Wabi-Sabi book!
Perhaps in just such a way I’ll stumble across my life purpose.
Carmel, thanks for the story — and I’m sure you’ll find your life purpose in the same way: through action.
Too many people try to sit around and navel-gaze to find their purpose, but I believe it’s something that only reveals itself as we move, interact, and uncover it.
Good luck!
Adam,
I wasn’t familiar with Wabi-Sabi before reading this, but my own thought have been aligning themselves more and more with this perspective. The perfection we seek lies in the constant change and transformation undergone on the way there. Sort of a paradox.
Adam,
I often find we can be at peace with our purpose in one word. A lot of self introspection might mean that for now, the purpose may be ‘teach’ or ‘learn’ or ‘play’ or ‘serve’.. When we can tune in and focus on one word that feels right to us, then more and more unfolds. It is when we go out searching for something outside of ourselves, with huge hidden meanings that it gets too complicated. So I say, choose a word, be with it for a while, a day or a year, and focus on that as your purpose. Time will allow it to unfold even more fully.
Great post. I’ve found some great help by taking the life purpose self-reflection test at The One Question (http://www.theonequestion.com). It’s free and might work for you too.
What is the purpose of life?
I dont think that anyone can give you correct answer for these questions. You all have probably asked yourself these questions many times throughout your lifetime. These are one of the hardest questions that everyone tries to find answer. But still, most people will never find the answer.